"Hello, Kaptain Lucky? This is Ernesto, the caretaker at
your
   country house."

        "Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a
problem?"

       "Um, I am just calling to advise you, Senor, that your dog
died."

        "My dog? Dead? The one that won the International
competition?"

       "Si, Senor, that's the one."

        "Damn! That's a pity! I spent a small fortune on that dog.

What did he die from?"

        "From eating rotten meat, Senor."

        "Rotten meat? Who the hell fed him rotten meat?"

          "Nobody, Senor. He ate the meat of the dead horse."

         "Dead horse? What dead horse?"

          "The thoroughbred, Senor Lucky. He died from all that
work
pulling the water cart."

         "Are you insane? What water cart?"

         "The one we used to put out the fire, Senor."

         "Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?"

         "The one at your house, Senor! A candle fell and the
curtains caught on fire."

         "What the hell! There's electricity at the house!  What
was the candle for?"

          "For the funeral, Senor."

          "WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL?"

          "Your wife's, Senor.
          She showed up one night out of the blue and I thought
she was a thief, so I hit her with your new
Tiger Woods Nike
driver."

          LONG  SILENCE...................

          "Ernesto, if you broke that driver --- you're in deep
              shit!"